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Old 06-25-2009, 05:46 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Newbiealert Landing Page review please
I have been trying to do more and read less.

I have some PPC credits and I want to throw them at a few different offers, including the one on this page:

Car seat installation made easy | Great Products All the Time

Please be gentle - it's my first one.

Second thought - don't be gentle. I want to learn how to get this right.
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Old 06-25-2009, 05:52 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Additional note:

The sentence that reads "If you are like me you think about this every time you drive around " is supposed to end with a geo script of the city - for some reason it's not working in Word Press. Anyone know how to fix that?
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Old 06-25-2009, 05:59 PM   #3 (permalink)
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too much text in the beginning. i was turned off. im sure a lot of ppl would open your lp, see all the writing, and just close it.

maybe add some more pics at the top and make the text bigger. it's too condensed and the font is too small so it feels like you're reading an essay.
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Old 06-25-2009, 10:29 PM   #4 (permalink)
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That's an expensive car seat. When you start PPC make sure you're not just advertising to moms but moms that can afford it.

An affili link needs to be higher up also to improve CT to offer. Maybe right under "Car Seat Installation: Protect your child by installing the seat correctly." Bullet points above all the <p> text might reduce bounce rate as well - kind of lead people into all that reading.
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Old 06-26-2009, 01:02 AM   #5 (permalink)
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Review
Quote:
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that shit neeeeedss to go

make it more colorful, add more pictures, cloak those links

thats all i can muster up for now
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tough crowd. Jeez I am Getting On StumbleUpon once i get alot Subscribers i am going to have people pay me to put there websites on StumbleUpon I think that a good way to Make some cash.
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Old 06-26-2009, 01:12 AM   #6 (permalink)
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May want to cloak your aff links.
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Old 06-26-2009, 11:18 AM   #7 (permalink)
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The price shouldnt be an issue. You should have some images/video and really kick in that sense of fear and urgency.
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Old 06-26-2009, 11:26 AM   #8 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by nat3r View Post
that shit neeeeedss to go

make it more colorful, add more pictures, cloak those links

thats all i can muster up for now
It's gone - but what's weird is I have NO idea how it got in there. I'm checking plugins, etc, but when I made the original post it was NOT there.

It was definitly in the body of the post though. I checked.

**EDIT: Pingcrawl was enabled.

Working on the rest of your suggestions...
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Old 06-26-2009, 08:55 PM   #9 (permalink)
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im not a copy writing guy, im still practicing, so i cant help you with that

glad all that garbage is gone at the bottom

you also need to take a look at all your font sizes, its all the same, vary it up, again i would choose a different theme,the current one you have in bland and mundane, the subject may be dismal

think of it this way, you meet a girl and shes dressed like shit and she doesnt look that good. she could be the greatest person on the planet, but your not going to give your time to a gal that looks like shit

dress your site up so people will want to have sex with it

and the link in that image is broken
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tough crowd. Jeez I am Getting On StumbleUpon once i get alot Subscribers i am going to have people pay me to put there websites on StumbleUpon I think that a good way to Make some cash.
word.
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Old 06-27-2009, 12:38 AM   #10 (permalink)
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Okay - font sizes fixed.

Broken links fixed and cloaked - learned how to do double meta refresh which is pretty easy.

Scary accident imagery added. Fire away.

Dressed it up a bit.....I
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Old 06-27-2009, 12:53 AM   #11 (permalink)
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also need to work on call to actions
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Old 06-27-2009, 12:54 AM   #12 (permalink)
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a video for this product would be pretty smart too
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Old 06-27-2009, 01:19 AM   #13 (permalink)
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a video for this product would be pretty smart too
Yeah...be nice if the network supplied that...
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