Review My Landing page Please

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anyone telling you that landing page looks good and will convert sales is either dumber than you or just has no clue what is going on.

"Here's my humble opinion on the club's upsides:" lol that is good sales and marketing? the question in the readers mind is who the fuck are you? you are selling a product that no straight man would buy. Starting out with questions is good but you don't have the right questions. There is nothing that says hey, stop your page skimming and read this! spend more than 10 minutes putting a page together otherwise you are wasting your time!
 


anyone telling you that landing page looks good and will convert sales is either dumber than you or just has no clue what is going on.

"Here's my humble opinion on the club's upsides:" lol that is good sales and marketing? the question in the readers mind is who the fuck are you? you are selling a product that no straight man would buy. Starting out with questions is good but you don't have the right questions. There is nothing that says hey, stop your page skimming and read this! spend more than 10 minutes putting a page together otherwise you are wasting your time!

Yea thats what I was thinking. There isn't enough selling. Take a look at ebook sales copy. They are designed to grab your attention.
 
Thanks for the advice guys. Lol Chris, I'm not into scrapbooking myself, but it looked like something that wouldn't be totally saturated, which is the main reason I picked it.
As to who am I, you're right: that should be addressed on the page. Except that I'm not a scrapper lol, and have 0 intention of putting my pic online.

Finally, the idea was to be kind of like a preview/review and soft-sell. Will keep you all up to date.

I am using the pizard url to hide the blogspot url from visitors, to whoever asked.
I have hosting with netfirms, but haven't learnt how to upload my stuff and all over there.
 
Or you could do something like:

My grandma could never find what she needed until she found this site.....
 
wow, you don't have to say who you really are, hell make someone up, molly macnutlovers or something, find scrap booking stuff and advise and put some up there. these women are looking for information first. they are not there to buy, you have to convince them with your content that the product you have on the site is worth them buying. also remove the blogger strip at top, looks cheap and is a link out from your site. I would use wordpress before blogger for a site like this!
 
yea, no shit, about the fake pic, I think there are maybe 3 pictures of me in the world but I am everyone from a teen selling ringtones to a 50 year old woman selling creams!
also the best markets are the ones that people think are saturated! there is actually no such thing unless you believe it is saturated!
 
Thanks for the advice guys. Lol Chris, I'm not into scrapbooking myself, but it looked like something that wouldn't be totally saturated, which is the main reason I picked it.
As to who am I, you're right: that should be addressed on the page. Except that I'm not a scrapper lol, and have 0 intention of putting my pic online.

Finally, the idea was to be kind of like a preview/review and soft-sell. Will keep you all up to date.

I am using the pizard url to hide the blogspot url from visitors, to whoever asked.
I have hosting with netfirms, but haven't learnt how to upload my stuff and all over there.

Let us know what it is done
 
I think it has to ring true in your readers mind! If you are an 19 year old kid playing webmaster in his mothers basement (not saying you are) then you aint got shit to say about scrap booking, now if you are sally smellypusspuss a 50 year old house wife who loves sending email to her 2 grand kids and can scrap book her ass off, the winner would be Mrs. Smellypusspuss every time! and no sex does not sell here!
 
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