In the last few years I've been really hardcore into self-improvement.
I gotta say that one most important thing ever is the power of positivity. And harnessing your true essence, rather than ego.
The problem with ego is that ego is not true you, it is logical construct of why you should be worthy, confident or positive. This is the classical "ups and downs" people experience - it is due to an overwhelming ego. Ego is society's constructs of what's important. Money, flashy cars, etc.
Self-esteem on the other hand is what you were like as a child, before you were "wounded" by external events and thus developed ego as means to protect yourself. The problem with large egos is that they are coming from a reactive position "I am this, therefore I'm worthy", rather than "I'm worthy, because I am".
Now, ego is good, if the ego is constructed on top of healthy self-esteem and adds to it, rather than replaces it. There are people who are rich and are unhappy and there are those who are rich and happy. The difference is essentially the amount of self-esteem that the ego consumed and they are literally always defined by external stimuli. The rich person with high self-esteem is the person who has healthy ego drives.
This person can lose all his money and still be happy. And make another few millions. Because his thought of "I am, therefore I am worthy" will keep creating positive thinking, thus propelling himself to new ideas and new money making ventures with ease and fluidity.
The negative, ego driven person will think "I lost everything, therefore I'm not worthy" or something along those lines.
I suppose to me this has been the key understanding of what true happiness really is. Everything that defines you from outside, every piece of identity you take from outside to make yourself feel good, has no true power. Everything that you bring forth from the inside from a position of healthy self-esteem will be unbreakable by external events.
This applies directly to anything in life.
Negative people often have larger-than-life ego that is also fueled by negative thoughts and low self-esteem. Positive people have healthy ego layered on top of self-esteem and the result is constant stream of positivity and life from them. Those are charismatic people. Those are billion dollar deal makers. Those are women magnets.
The hardest paradigm shift for negative people though is realizing how entangled they are in the net of ego and negative thinking. Most people are completely unaware of this, and since they are driven by ego, look for reasons of their failures from outside.
So, how does one become a balanced "I am therefore I'm worthy" individual? Try your hardest to remember how you were when you were a kid. Try to re-connect with that self-esteem that was there and make your best effort to think only positively and watch as life transforms around you. This process might take quite a bit of time, because you've been layering your ego to replace your wounded self-esteem for YEARS. However, the end result is so worth it. You will be always happy, everyone will want to be around you, money will come easy, life will be easy.
Personally from childhood certain negative people made me feel guilty, scared when I was having positive vibes, and intentions and was generally having fun. Thus the association formed: I'm feeling good -> feeling guilty/scared/bad. This has resulted in all sorts of difficulties for me. From forming lasting relationships with people to having success in life.
I mean the purpose of life essentially is to create more of good, to have fun, to have good times. If everyone thought those positive thoughts and everyone was having fun and good times, then it would be pretty good life.
I gotta say that one most important thing ever is the power of positivity. And harnessing your true essence, rather than ego.
The problem with ego is that ego is not true you, it is logical construct of why you should be worthy, confident or positive. This is the classical "ups and downs" people experience - it is due to an overwhelming ego. Ego is society's constructs of what's important. Money, flashy cars, etc.
Self-esteem on the other hand is what you were like as a child, before you were "wounded" by external events and thus developed ego as means to protect yourself. The problem with large egos is that they are coming from a reactive position "I am this, therefore I'm worthy", rather than "I'm worthy, because I am".
Now, ego is good, if the ego is constructed on top of healthy self-esteem and adds to it, rather than replaces it. There are people who are rich and are unhappy and there are those who are rich and happy. The difference is essentially the amount of self-esteem that the ego consumed and they are literally always defined by external stimuli. The rich person with high self-esteem is the person who has healthy ego drives.
This person can lose all his money and still be happy. And make another few millions. Because his thought of "I am, therefore I am worthy" will keep creating positive thinking, thus propelling himself to new ideas and new money making ventures with ease and fluidity.
The negative, ego driven person will think "I lost everything, therefore I'm not worthy" or something along those lines.
I suppose to me this has been the key understanding of what true happiness really is. Everything that defines you from outside, every piece of identity you take from outside to make yourself feel good, has no true power. Everything that you bring forth from the inside from a position of healthy self-esteem will be unbreakable by external events.
This applies directly to anything in life.
Negative people often have larger-than-life ego that is also fueled by negative thoughts and low self-esteem. Positive people have healthy ego layered on top of self-esteem and the result is constant stream of positivity and life from them. Those are charismatic people. Those are billion dollar deal makers. Those are women magnets.
The hardest paradigm shift for negative people though is realizing how entangled they are in the net of ego and negative thinking. Most people are completely unaware of this, and since they are driven by ego, look for reasons of their failures from outside.
So, how does one become a balanced "I am therefore I'm worthy" individual? Try your hardest to remember how you were when you were a kid. Try to re-connect with that self-esteem that was there and make your best effort to think only positively and watch as life transforms around you. This process might take quite a bit of time, because you've been layering your ego to replace your wounded self-esteem for YEARS. However, the end result is so worth it. You will be always happy, everyone will want to be around you, money will come easy, life will be easy.
Personally from childhood certain negative people made me feel guilty, scared when I was having positive vibes, and intentions and was generally having fun. Thus the association formed: I'm feeling good -> feeling guilty/scared/bad. This has resulted in all sorts of difficulties for me. From forming lasting relationships with people to having success in life.
I mean the purpose of life essentially is to create more of good, to have fun, to have good times. If everyone thought those positive thoughts and everyone was having fun and good times, then it would be pretty good life.
thanks josh
