I like Subway, but they make a good case for there being laws on what cheese actually is, because, like McDonalds, they put something tasteless slimy and yellow in their food and apparently that's cheese.
There's barely any discernible difference, between the different "cheeses" they serve.
"Do you want cheese with that?"
"Yes please... What? No. Get that disgusting yellow crap out of my roll. Do you have any actual cheese?"
"Yes, this is cheese sir. Ok it does taste like slimy, milky rubber, but 5% of it comes from a cow. We have it in several colours and it tastes like several different things, all nothing like cheese. Want some?"
"This is Europe for fucks sake. There's more varieties of real fucking cheese than there are people. You've no excuse to inflict that vile crap on my palette."
"We know that, but studies have shown that more people think it might be cheese than think it might not be."
"No, I'll just have the 'meat', thank you."