Ahh man, I struggle with this almost daily. I am one of those; drinks every three day types, yet when I drink, I drink excessively. If you put a case of beer in front of me and dared me to drink it in a night, I would drink 30 beers just to prove a point. Once it hits the lips...
It's almost as if I have 2 personalities. One who cares about his body, exercises almost every day, eats right. Then there is my other personality who just wants to get fucked up.
I don't know, I feel like it is really starting to affect my brain, and my body. I get raging hangovers and they sometimes last two days. Not just that, but the next day after I drink I want to eat everything in sight.
Hello, my name is John and I'm an alcoholic.
This was me bro!
What really resonated with me about when anything becomes a problem:
If it negatively effects your life or the lives of others (especially your kids and wife), and it's done by choice, it most likely is "a problem" that you should do your best to eliminate when ready. Unfortunately for most of us, "when ready" = Hit bottom. Everybodys bottom is different.
My bottom happened spread out over about a year time period with a couple trips to the hospital (waking up there all by myself, no idea where I am, and had to walk home about 5 miles hungover and half dead on a workday), divorce, several $100K+ lost jobs/contracts, loss of a child, and almost a second divorce. It can be an ugly, private, and shameful experience, especially when everything else on the outside appears to be everything it is not internally. You can have the cars, the women, the money, the brands, and the clout, and be a miserable fuck when other forces can cause you to forgo responsibility for another "pleasurable" night out at the clubs or bars which could potentially risk your stability.
Like they say, "I was sick and tired, of being sick and tired", essentially, your own personal bottom that motivated you to make that change.
Another thing I say to my friends considering quitting or people that claim to have "control", "If I put 2 premium ice cold micro brews in the fridge, would you drink them?"
My answer would be "Sweet, thanks for my favorite beer, but no thanks, that's not near enough to have a good time on"...
For about 2 years straight I would drink 2 tall boys of Newcastle on my way home from work, grab a case of Red Hook from the market across the street (lived in a sweet highrise in Downtown Seattle), and drink the entire thing + fight with my wife. Maybe a couple glasses of wine on top of all that (that's what my wife drank). But we didn't have a problem cause we "drank the good stuff" and made alot of money

Then of course you have Wed & Saturday nights out at the clubs...UFC fights, on and on....
Good luck with whatever path you choose to take my man.
I'm now 60 lbs lighter
Getting ripped working out 5 days per week
Eat organic
Juice
Coaching my kids
All good shit and I've never missed the partying/boozing
Had to stop engaging with many friends though, that's the hardest part. But it's not hard when you realize those relationships revolve around drinking & partying and really have no true personal value add to your life otherwise.