If An Internet Marketer Were President

Together, Could We Get An Internet Marketer into the Presidency?

  • Hell Yes!

    Votes: 25 20.5%
  • Maybe.

    Votes: 14 11.5%
  • Fuck no, the man owns it all!

    Votes: 47 38.5%
  • I'm too lazy to care.

    Votes: 36 29.5%

  • Total voters
    122


LOL, a glimpse of the Affiliate National Convention:

7889geeks.jpg
 
Factors that go on the watch list:

  • Grungy, unkempt appearance.
  • Backpacks with electronics.
  • Headphones.
  • Looking like you just came out of your mother's basement to meet little asians.

Lol, just about every person in the picture would be profiled as a potential terrorist/pedo based on looks.

It'd probably make Washington wet themselves if they saw such a gathering for political office and start some terrorist investigations.
 
Can you imagine the smear campaign against our "party"

"they told you could be skinny, are you?"
" these people fill your email with all the spam"
" they stole 20 million POF emails and your passwords and sold it to the Russians"
" they will put their popups in our schools"
" hes a social misfit he hides behind his computer"

Blah blah blah I am pretty sure it would be ugly. The question is could the marketing world sway that message enough with its own reverse smear campaign? I think it could. A few Photoshop guys and a viral campaign would be underway. Interesting concept.

The bottom line is you would need to get permision from the guys that go to the Bohemian Grove every July. If you don't have permission to run, our candidate would probably wind up disappearing if it were a close race.
 
I would independently campaign for someone who was already running

Is there anyone running who isn't a complete piece of shit? Would be nice..
 
Top 5 Reasons why an internet marketer will never be president of the USA:

1. Most Americans are naive enough to want a POTUS who is poor, humble, and looks and thinks just like they do. Not quite the image that the Rich Jerk is going for!

2. The majority of the USA is too stupid (way, way, WAY too stupid) to understand that having a businessman in the whitehouse has it's benefits... Really, what benefits would our guy be offering them? "We'll teach you all to stop living paycheck to paycheck?" -They're too lazy to even want that!

3. Any internet marketer who we would want to be president among us would have to be doing far too well to stoop to such a low-pay-high-stress position. Honestly, I wouldn't wish the presidency on Hellblazer. (For reasons of his mercy this time, not his politics. ;) I certainly wouldn't wish such a shitstorm on Guerilla. (And I'd be pissed if he took it and DFB went downhill while he's in office!)

4. The POTUS must be well-educated in many areas, usually in an ivy-league school. Matters like foreign diplomacy may sound like something that isn't the very most pressing issue to Americans, but in a country of immigrants it turns out that MOST people here do care about it and lots of issues like that sway their vote.

5. We hang out in depraved places like WF that would be used as slanderous material against us.


Bonus reason:
Negative TV ads usually win elections in this country. Negative spam gets deleted. ;)
 
If An Internet Marketer Were President, the web space would be "polluted" even more with Affiliate links, CPA offers, SEO Spam links, PPC ads, Dickrolls & Boobs...LOL!
 
Can you imagine the smear campaign against our "party"

"they told you could be skinny, are you?"
" these people fill your email with all the spam"
" they stole 20 million POF emails and your passwords and sold it to the Russians"
" they will put their popups in our schools"
" hes a social misfit he hides behind his computer"

Blah blah blah I am pretty sure it would be ugly. The question is could the marketing world sway that message enough with its own reverse smear campaign? I think it could. A few Photoshop guys and a viral campaign would be underway. Interesting concept.

The bottom line is you would need to get permision from the guys that go to the Bohemian Grove every July. If you don't have permission to run, our candidate would probably wind up disappearing if it were a close race.

Only ChrisS puts his popups in our schools. The rest of us just sell shit to the kids.