Luba - OMG -
- Thread starter Yuma504
- Start date
(O_o)
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Yuma woke up to notice his wife was missing from his bed. He slumped out of the bedroom and down the hall to grab some coffee when he was ambushed from behind. Two tiny hands wrapped around his head and covered his eyes. "Happy birthday, muffin-butt!" squeaked Amanda in his ear. He smiled and turned his head, "Uh oh, what is this?" Amanda nudged him to move forward giggling, "You'll seee...". The couple went down the stairs and out into the front yard, still in their pajamas. Once they reached the driveway, Amanda removed her hands and yelled "Surprise!". Yuma's eyes adjusted to the light and laid his sight on the brand new BMW he had been fantasizing about. "Oh my god, babe!" he said excitedly as he bounced over to his gift.
He peered inside the black tinted windows and saw a strange movement within. Amanda raised her hand and pressed the button to unlock the door. "There's something inside for you, baby!" she said smirking. "When did you do this?" Yuma asked in astonishment as he opened the driver's side door. The interior of the brand new car was filled to the brim with black snakes, squirming all over each other. Almost as soon as he realized this, the snakes closest to him began to latch onto him, sinking their venom into his legs and arms. Yuma was soon consumed by the reptiles and curled up on the pavement as they overtook him. Amanda walked over to him with an angry expression. "The car is for me, asshole" she said as she pulled down her panties and decorated his lifeless face with a long brown turd.
He peered inside the black tinted windows and saw a strange movement within. Amanda raised her hand and pressed the button to unlock the door. "There's something inside for you, baby!" she said smirking. "When did you do this?" Yuma asked in astonishment as he opened the driver's side door. The interior of the brand new car was filled to the brim with black snakes, squirming all over each other. Almost as soon as he realized this, the snakes closest to him began to latch onto him, sinking their venom into his legs and arms. Yuma was soon consumed by the reptiles and curled up on the pavement as they overtook him. Amanda walked over to him with an angry expression. "The car is for me, asshole" she said as she pulled down her panties and decorated his lifeless face with a long brown turd.
Dude... I am many moons past puberty. Elizabeth Shue was the shit when I mercilessly solo abusing my cock back in the day.
And I bet it is safe to assume the only thing that makes your dick hard is the hair gelled metrosexual reflection of yourself. FUCKING POOFTER!!!!
Congratulations, tin foil boi...
You just graduated to full-tilt fucktard with this thread.
Ban this stroke AND his bony-assed iron curtain fantasy.
wtf.
You just graduated to full-tilt fucktard with this thread.
Ban this stroke AND his bony-assed iron curtain fantasy.
wtf.
probably a lot of girls like that in russian nightclubs who would appreciate your plum card.
Would someone PLEASE give this douchenozzle ban privileges? I am so sick of reading his whiny drivel of "please ban this person for this asinine reason" and "if I only had a ban hammer" rants.
BLOW ME YOU WHINY ASS BITCH!