I like Mike.
Short, Cute, Powerful when needs be. It also ryhmes with Dike, Sike, Pike and Like. It reminds me of myself. In Fact, I think I may name my lil fella, Mike.
I don't like SEO Mike. Why would you want to search engine optimize your name?
I'm not sure why you would call yourself, Don't care. Better than ChickenFucker I suppose.