Touch My Truffles = You Shot in The Head

[cryptix]

Lazy Ass Edition:
Man catches another man digging in his truffle bed, stealing his "black diamond" truffles which fetch some really nice coin on the delicacy market.
Truffle thief takes a bullet to the body and head. Truffle thief dies. Shooter has not been charged with anything.

Readers Edition:
French truffle farmer shoots man he feared was trying to steal 'black diamonds' | World news | The Guardian

Discuss...

OP Sidenote: Hoooray for guns! Hooooray for protecting private property! Boooo Hissssss on stupid motherfuckin thieves!

 

[Ishmael]

Wrongness lies in the eye of the perceiver.

 

[(O_o)]

The price of the highly prized black truffle varies from season to season, market to market, continent to continent and broker to broker. In 2009 and 2010 in North America, black truffle prices averaged $500 to $900 a pound, or $35 to $55 an ounce. Generally, a more expensive truffle will be moister and more aromatic.

Read more: What is the price of black truffles? | Answerbag What is the price of black truffles? | Answerbag

Lol brb goin' slang some black truffles online.

 

[InternetAuthor]

I thought this was going to be a funny post about chocolate truffles and trying to protect Christmas candy from thieving family members, but maybe that's just my house...

 

[Groomez]

Don't take my MUSHROOMS BRAH!!

</drunk post>