After a long and peaceful slumber, I awake naturally at 9:00 a.m to sunshine and a smile. I wake up whenever because I do not give a fuck. I do not like to schedule meetings or phone calls in the morning and therefore do not have an alarm clock. Alarm clocks are for bitches. I slide my sexy hairless ass across my extremely high thread count sheets, I then put on my slippers and begin to make the trek to my kitchen. My house is fucking huge so it takes a minute to get there. Upon arriving in my kitchen, I take a pitcher of freshly juiced fruit juice (I bought the fruits myself at the farmers market because I have time to go do that kind of shit) out of the fridge and pour myself a glass.
I drink a protein shake and make a sandwich out of some meat that my butcher cut for me yesterday. It is now 9:30, time to head to the gym. I appear at quite the conundrum, I sit there staring at my huge fucking garage attempting to decide which vehicle to take to the gym. I decide on the Denali since it is early morning and I do not feel like stuntin' just yet. The Denali is a smooth, comfortable ride which pampers me nicely.
I pull up to a stoplight and notice that there is a car full of college chicks on my left admiring my sweet rims. I roll down my window just enough for them to get a peek at my Gucci shades and my flexed left arm grasping the steering wheel. Their eyes light up like Christmas time. I chunk them the deuces and make a right turn into my gym. I start everyday with a trip to the gym.
After exercising I get down to business for a couple of hours. I shoot off a few emails and check a few campaigns. I make a few calls to ensure that my latest web development projects are being worked on. My employees know to answer the phone within the first 3 rings when I am calling, because I do not like to wait. I rule my businesses with an iron fist, deadlines always get made and proper procedures are always followed. At the same time I am a generous ruler, I pay my employees more than average and allow them to use my Aspen penthouse whenever they need.
After work I venture to one of my favorite local golf courses. It is kind of a long drive to the course (20 minutes) and I feel like stuntin' so I whip out the M3. The local window tint laws allow for a maximum of 24% tint. In my typical not a single fuck was given mentality I got the m3 wrapped in 5% tint solely so that I could smoke a blunt on the way to the golf course in privacy. I keep the windows up but the sunroof is always open. This allows me to ash my giant blunt into the wind easily. I arrive at the golf course extremely baked. This was my intention because golf is fucking amazing when stoned. I meet an old childhood friend in the clubhouse. My friend is not used to my wealth so some of my actions are shocking to him. I am mildly inconvenienced by the sight of his old crappy clubs so I simply purchase a fucking brand new set of Calaways for him from the golf shop. It cost me 1k for the entire set but I had just won 10k in Vegas last weekend and had some extra pocket change to blow. I also hired the course pro to follow us and analyze our game. After a couple of holes I grow tired of the pro and his condescending talk and promptly tell him to hit the road. After hearing this he walks away without contesting or questioning my statement. It is quite obvious to him that I could easily whoop his ass right there on the course if he did not remove himself in a speedy manner. I end up shooting a 73 for the day.
I roll a dice to figure out which girl I will have dinner with tonight. I eat out almost every night and must have a woman to converse with at the dinner table. I send a single text message to my date and hop in my shower. I do not know what its called, but my shower is basically a giant glass box in the middle of a giant fucking bathroom. It's pretty cool I guess but not nearly as cool as the one in my Aspen condo. After slipping on a pair of the finest slacks and a freshly ironed Polo button up I hop into my fucking brand new Dodge Challenger.
It is really nice for driving around the city at night. My date goes extremely well, I am very rude at the table and interrupt dinner several times to answer phone calls. My date is used to this and knows that business must be handled. After dinner I depart and let my date know that "I might call her over later."
I say later because it is Tuesday night and on Tuesday nights I go to the casino to play poker. On my way out of the restaurant, the waiter runs out and thanks me again in the parking lot. He reminded me of myself before I got big into IM so I tipped him about tree fitty. I had a couple of glasses of wine at dinner and to finish what I started I order a Crown and Coke immediately upon entering the casino. The waitress is extremely prompt delivering my drink. She knows that I do not like to wait and to show her my appreciation I toss her a twenty and advise her to replace my drink when it starts to get low. I am dominating poker.
I am up about a thousand and am really starting to catch a buzz. I head to the wash room to relieve myself when the waitress stops me halfway and starts to flirt with me uncontrollably. She pulls me into a side closet and I proceed to suck on her large fake breasts. I really wanted to take a piss so I throw her aside and finish my deed. At this point in the evening I am pretty trashed so I call my date and have her come up to the casino to pick me up. I do not want to deal with the hassle of retrieving my Challenger the next day so I have a cab pick her up and bring her here so she can drive me home. Upon arriving at my palace I waste no time in banging her. She is satisfied first and then it's my turn. After an hour or so of hot steamy fucking I call a cab for her and see her out. It has been a long day and I turn over in bed to check stats on some sites I had been looking at. My macbook pro has illuminated keys so it is not a problem typing in the dark. With a smile on my face I realize that I am quickly going to make a very high ROI on several of my new website ideas. I will have to call my developer in the morning. I close my macbook and reflect on the day I have had. I need to get to sleep soon, I've got to go to the gym in the morning.
I drink a protein shake and make a sandwich out of some meat that my butcher cut for me yesterday. It is now 9:30, time to head to the gym. I appear at quite the conundrum, I sit there staring at my huge fucking garage attempting to decide which vehicle to take to the gym. I decide on the Denali since it is early morning and I do not feel like stuntin' just yet. The Denali is a smooth, comfortable ride which pampers me nicely.
I pull up to a stoplight and notice that there is a car full of college chicks on my left admiring my sweet rims. I roll down my window just enough for them to get a peek at my Gucci shades and my flexed left arm grasping the steering wheel. Their eyes light up like Christmas time. I chunk them the deuces and make a right turn into my gym. I start everyday with a trip to the gym.
After exercising I get down to business for a couple of hours. I shoot off a few emails and check a few campaigns. I make a few calls to ensure that my latest web development projects are being worked on. My employees know to answer the phone within the first 3 rings when I am calling, because I do not like to wait. I rule my businesses with an iron fist, deadlines always get made and proper procedures are always followed. At the same time I am a generous ruler, I pay my employees more than average and allow them to use my Aspen penthouse whenever they need.
After work I venture to one of my favorite local golf courses. It is kind of a long drive to the course (20 minutes) and I feel like stuntin' so I whip out the M3. The local window tint laws allow for a maximum of 24% tint. In my typical not a single fuck was given mentality I got the m3 wrapped in 5% tint solely so that I could smoke a blunt on the way to the golf course in privacy. I keep the windows up but the sunroof is always open. This allows me to ash my giant blunt into the wind easily. I arrive at the golf course extremely baked. This was my intention because golf is fucking amazing when stoned. I meet an old childhood friend in the clubhouse. My friend is not used to my wealth so some of my actions are shocking to him. I am mildly inconvenienced by the sight of his old crappy clubs so I simply purchase a fucking brand new set of Calaways for him from the golf shop. It cost me 1k for the entire set but I had just won 10k in Vegas last weekend and had some extra pocket change to blow. I also hired the course pro to follow us and analyze our game. After a couple of holes I grow tired of the pro and his condescending talk and promptly tell him to hit the road. After hearing this he walks away without contesting or questioning my statement. It is quite obvious to him that I could easily whoop his ass right there on the course if he did not remove himself in a speedy manner. I end up shooting a 73 for the day.
I roll a dice to figure out which girl I will have dinner with tonight. I eat out almost every night and must have a woman to converse with at the dinner table. I send a single text message to my date and hop in my shower. I do not know what its called, but my shower is basically a giant glass box in the middle of a giant fucking bathroom. It's pretty cool I guess but not nearly as cool as the one in my Aspen condo. After slipping on a pair of the finest slacks and a freshly ironed Polo button up I hop into my fucking brand new Dodge Challenger.
It is really nice for driving around the city at night. My date goes extremely well, I am very rude at the table and interrupt dinner several times to answer phone calls. My date is used to this and knows that business must be handled. After dinner I depart and let my date know that "I might call her over later."
I say later because it is Tuesday night and on Tuesday nights I go to the casino to play poker. On my way out of the restaurant, the waiter runs out and thanks me again in the parking lot. He reminded me of myself before I got big into IM so I tipped him about tree fitty. I had a couple of glasses of wine at dinner and to finish what I started I order a Crown and Coke immediately upon entering the casino. The waitress is extremely prompt delivering my drink. She knows that I do not like to wait and to show her my appreciation I toss her a twenty and advise her to replace my drink when it starts to get low. I am dominating poker.
I am up about a thousand and am really starting to catch a buzz. I head to the wash room to relieve myself when the waitress stops me halfway and starts to flirt with me uncontrollably. She pulls me into a side closet and I proceed to suck on her large fake breasts. I really wanted to take a piss so I throw her aside and finish my deed. At this point in the evening I am pretty trashed so I call my date and have her come up to the casino to pick me up. I do not want to deal with the hassle of retrieving my Challenger the next day so I have a cab pick her up and bring her here so she can drive me home. Upon arriving at my palace I waste no time in banging her. She is satisfied first and then it's my turn. After an hour or so of hot steamy fucking I call a cab for her and see her out. It has been a long day and I turn over in bed to check stats on some sites I had been looking at. My macbook pro has illuminated keys so it is not a problem typing in the dark. With a smile on my face I realize that I am quickly going to make a very high ROI on several of my new website ideas. I will have to call my developer in the morning. I close my macbook and reflect on the day I have had. I need to get to sleep soon, I've got to go to the gym in the morning.
