Staying faithful..

I find it really bizarre that there is a thread going on here where everybody is justifying cheating, while one thread over there is a thread with everyone calling somebody's ex-wife a bitch for cheating on him.

A lot of double standards up in here.
 


I agree with basically everything OP has said. One thing I really hate is when you turn down an opportunity to cheat even though you want to really bad but you don't because you love the girl you're with and then for whatever reason you end up breaking up with your girlfriend later. Then you always regret not cheating.

I say have no regrets.

Let the chips fall where they may.

Martha Stewart's polishing the brass on the Titanic man, it's all going down anyway.
 
For all of you married guys or guys with serious long term girlfriends... How do you stay faithful? It's a serious problem for me, and honestly, I've NEVER been able to do it. Never married, but serious long term girlfriends that I came close to marrying a couple of times but just couldn't and I always cheated. The time I came closest to marriage I felt completely panicked and just could not commit to it... and she was a faithful and beautiful girl that many men would love to have as a wife.

This is not a troll thread.. I seriously do not understand how I could mentally commit to only sleeping with ONE girl for the rest of my LIFE. I mean.. I love females too much. Just flirting with one in the donut shop or wherever the fuck is enough to make me mentally stray. I understand the value of a good consistent partner that backs you and supports you no matter what, and I see these ultra successful men being seemingly happily married and the combination of those two things makes me think I should start considering settling down at age 31.. but fuck, what is better than a hot 23 year old new girlfriend? I love meeting new and interesting women/girls and having sex with them, and getting to know there different personalities... and relationships inevitably get stale and thus boring. The opposite of happiness is boredom.. I just don't see myself giving up the ability to participate in the "chase" even though I know it isn't always fulfilling...it's exciting. Variety is the spice of life right? It's literally in my DNA to procreate with as many females is possible... that's a pretty serious urge to suppress for an entire lifetime.

Do you guys not feel like a fucking killer whale in a tank at Sea World with your dorsal fin all flopped over and shit? That's exactly how I feel in those situations, but everyone around me is diving right in without the slightest hesitation.

If it bothers you that much, then don't commit. Just because other people are doing it, doesn't mean you have to.

It comes down to what you feel is really important.

Personally, I found being single tedious. Although it was fairly easy to meet attractive women, I just found the whole thing to be a terrible pain in the ass, as I invariably had nothing in common with 95% of the people I ended up meeting. So I guess I'm at the opposite end of the scale to you in that sense.

Plus, my wife is a very, very good cook. That counts for a lot in my world. In my personal experience, finding someone who is great in the kitchen is way harder than finding someone who's great in the sack. I once went out with a girl who was a total nymphomaniac, but her idea of cooking was to put a bottle of sauce into some pasta. No, no, no.
 
I couldnt stand the same woman the rest of my life, let alone for more than like 10 days... Just my 02. I guess im a whore. Although I'm Christian, I shouldn't live like this but fuck it I suppose?
 
That's because you're currently in love.

If you aren't in love, you shouldn't be with that person. Obvious no? And if you're talking about puppy love n shit, we're outta that stage, 3 years deep.

I agree w/ mgrunin, I trust this girl with everything and I know she'll back me in anything I do + most other women are straight up STUPID nowadays.
 
It's always 'My girl is different' until she cheats, then it's 'all women are whores'.
 
I've had a lot of girlfriends but only one I truly loved. Pretty much cheated in every relationship before and had the same problem as you - with her I simply found it much easier not too cheat and we were together for 2 years. I just didn't want to do that to her. I'm not sure how it would have gone if we went out for a lot longer than that.
 
A lot of people cheat. If all you want is romanticism and "the chase" don't get into a long term relationship. Be upfront with girls, tell them you're not into the long term thing. Some won't date you because of it, but at least you won't be hurting them.
 
Well... I'm open to self examination, and the possibility that I may have abandonment issues, or the need for social power, or the host of other psychological labels that have been suggested in this thread as I've considered many of these things myself. I've given this a shit ton of thought.... really I think it's as simple as I love females and fear boredom. Some things can be as simple as they seem and I believe this to be one of them.

I simply can't imagine not making effort to sleep with beautiful women.. It's one of life's greatest carnal pleasures and I suppose I am indulgent. For those comparing it to drugs.. I disagree. Drugs aren't natural... you do not have an innate desire to snort coke. You do however have an innate desire to sleep with the most attractive female that you can get. I have decent self discipline... I am not referring to desperately going out to the bar every night to find whatever slut will spread her legs for me. I'm talking about going after high value, intelligent, hot as fuck woman.

Cheating, of course, is a pathetic thing to do.. I agree with that. I don't go into a relationship with intentions of cheating. When you have those magical chemicals flowing in your brains it's easy to believe your own lies to yourself. You meet an amazing women, get to know her and next thing you know.. BAM! You're in a fucking relationship. Then you meet the next amazing women....

I certainly am not knocking those that find happiness in marriage. I'm just wondering how the fuck you do it? Possibly, we are just different. Idk really. If I could figure this shit out for my life, one way or the other, and feel completely confident with my decision.. it would literally be a huge weight lifted off of my shoulders. Either way I go, I truly feel I am missing out on something. So that leads me right back to cheating... where I can have my cake and eat it too. Fuck it, guess I'm just lacking in the superior "ethics" that so many others seem to possess with ease.
 
OP, this was eluded by the previous poster but I had the same problem.

Here is the solution.

Open relationships. Up until I was 29 I could not commit to anyone for more than six months, my average was 3 months. I am wired that way. I actually never felt there was anything wrong with me. Anyway, the solution? Open relationships.

I have been in an open relationship for three years now. Not only am I free to do what I want, but I also have someone I care and trust around at the same time. Its win/win.

Quite awesome. Only time I got crap for it was because my sexting with another girl was better than I have ever texted my girlfriend and she asked to receive more texts like that. That's it. Takes some good communication and being open about what you want but it works great.

Difficult to find girls I'm into that would agree to this. I really need to get out of the bible belt.
 
I also find it hard to believe that all those who talk about how they would never cheat, would actually stay true to their ethics if put in that one perfect situation with that one ultimate woman.

I can say, without doubt, if I was married to the woman of my dreams and the mother of my retarded kid... if you put Scarlett Johansson in front of me naked and willing.. it's over. Does this make me a bad person?
 
I can say, without doubt, if I was married to the woman of my dreams and the mother of my retarded kid... if you put Scarlett Johansson in front of me naked and willing.. it's over. Does this make me a bad person?
I value character a lot. You value sensual pleasure more. That's just how it is.
 
Pussy is Pussy. You're cheating on one pussy, for the same exact pussy. +1 on the logic

This a joke? Keep telling yourself that bro... whatever logic makes it easier for you.

It's cool you have an intelligent girl and that you stay committed. I can respect that... but you are putting into text for other people to read, the loop you play in your head to keep your mind where it needs to be to deny your natural urges. Again, I respect that... but don't go try and pass your "logic" as some kind of inherent truth.

I assume from the limited amount of info that you've given that you do not have much experience with multiple girls, much less women? Let me assure you a "pussy" is not a complete replica of the next specimen. Not to mention, this isn't just about pussy.. it's about connecting with more than one amazing women on multiple levels not just sexual. It can not be boiled down to just the sensation my penis feels from being inside multiple "exact replica" vaginas. lol.
 
I value character a lot. You value sensual pleasure more. That's just how it is.

Pretty presumptuous. You seem pretty confident that your character and value of character is superior to mine. I find this statement simply retarded. You're basing this on the fact that I am not so sure that our societal norm and accepted standards are worthy of dictating how I choose to live my life. You of all people should be able to see past the limitations of societal norms considering your views on anarchy? To some this would put their value of character above your.. to which I'm sure that you would be quick to reply with the idea that most things, including character, are subjective.

You seem to be straying from your traditional line of thinking in order to feel superior. That's just how it is.
 
Pretty presumptuous. You seem pretty confident that your character and value of character is superior to mine. I find this statement simply retarded. You're basing this on the fact that I am not so sure that our societal norm and accepted standards are worthy of dictating how I choose to live my life. You of all people should be able to see past the limitations of societal norms considering your views on anarchy? To some this would put their value of character above your.. to which I'm sure that you would be quick to reply with the idea that most things, including character, are subjective.

You seem to be straying from your traditional line of thinking in order to feel superior. That's just how it is.

Your superfluous diatribe against the preceding poster indicates that a point has been touched.

I sense no superiority in the meaning behind the words composed by the gentleman guerilla.

Rather, I perceive a sense of inferiority leaking through your exposition of your
values as related to the finite temporal relations that you have come here to whine about.

Let us face the facts of reality.

The female form and the pleasures it can provide are limited.

Once the testicles are expelled of their fluid, and the biological function that compels you to move your hips in a manner that you would not show your mother is complete, what is that you think? Be honest to yourself of what you think.

To go back to the point of the female form, it only comes in so many shapes and sizes. Eventually, you must place less importance on variety. Whether it be through boredom, aging, the abandoning of building an identity around sexual encounters, or the contraction of an STD which cripples the member from wanting to enter another hole unless it be a sanitized fleshlight; we must come to put less importance on the old 'in out', 'in out'.

What else is left, you ask? I say character is left. Many females might have the same body type, but you will not find the same character anywhere else in the Universe.
 
I also find it hard to believe that all those who talk about how they would never cheat, would actually stay true to their ethics if put in that one perfect situation with that one ultimate woman.

I can say, without doubt, if I was married to the woman of my dreams and the mother of my retarded kid... if you put Scarlett Johansson in front of me naked and willing.. it's over. Does this make me a bad person?

Basically what you are saying here is that Scarlett Johansson is the woman of your dreams.

Because if you were married to the woman of your dreams, there would be no reason to stray.

In fact, the woman of your dreams would be the one to bring up the suggestion of fucking both you and Scarlett.
 
Your superfluous diatribe against the preceding poster indicates that a point has been touched.

I sense no superiority in the meaning behind the words composed by the gentleman guerilla.

Rather, I perceive a sense of inferiority leaking through your exposition of your
values as related to the finite temporal relations that you have come here to whine about.

Let us face the facts of reality.

The female form and the pleasures it can provide are limited.

Once the testicles are expelled of their fluid, and the biological function that compels you to move your hips in a manner that you would not show your mother is complete, what is that you think? Be honest to yourself of what you think.

To go back to the point of the female form, it only comes in so many shapes and sizes. Eventually, you must place less importance on variety. Whether it be through boredom, aging, the abandoning of building an identity around sexual encounters, or the contraction of an STD which cripples the member from wanting to enter another hole unless it be a sanitized fleshlight; we must come to put less importance on the old 'in out', 'in out'.

What else is left, you ask? I say character is left. Many females might have the same body type, but you will not find the same character anywhere else in the Universe.

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I don't do it these days as I've lost interest in sex. I'd rather just jerk off to porn and then get on with the business of running a business.

But TBH - I've cheated on every girlfriend I've had. It's just sex, who gives a fuck. If I was having a deep and meaningful relationship with these sluts, I could understand the hurt but sex is just sex.

If you're gonna cheat, there is no point feeling guilty after the fact. You just need to find the ones that have so little self esteem left that they just accept it as part of the relationship with you. Single mums are good for this.


Ah.. I'm such a fucking bastard.