Soccer is for fags and Europeans ... which really are kinda the same thing. Have a little American pride and watch an American sport.
Oddly enough, over 100 million of your countrymen are going to be watching World Cup Football on TV this tournament, placing you roughly in 8th position globally. Over 40 thousand of your countrymen are in South Africa watching the games live, second only to the host country in numbers.
That makes it about as "American" as any other sport you watch.
Nice try though. Keep on keepin' on red neck douchebag.